And to think I thought I was getting better. How dare I.

Yesterday I did pretty darn well. I even called the leasing office and got the rent lowered $40 (not much, but every little bit helps).

Jenn came home from work, I cooked dinner all was going well.

Then we laughed. Things can't go well for almost 24 hours can they? Jenn was doing some laundry and noticed the floor was wet. We spend time staring at the washer thinking it was leaking. Again, we couldn't be that lucky. If the washer had been leaking we could have just not used it anymore last night and called maintenance in the morning.

Nope, it was the water heater. Upon further investigation we found a loverly pipe leaking water all over the place. Instant call to emergency maintenance at 8:28pm. Carlos the supervisor and our former neighbor whom we love happened to be on call and said he would be right over.

I locked me, Minne and Igan into the bedroom so that they wouldn't get in his way and Jenn stayed downstairs chatting with him and "helping". (otherwise known as Heidi avoiding people like she has for the last 26 days) After an hour and fifteen minutes of working on the pipes thinking that was the problem Carlos declares the heater dead, and goes to get a new one.

So...Jenn and I finally got to bed at about 1am. This is the one and only reason I rent (well besides not having money for a down payment or the fact that we are still working on rebuilding our credit from stupid mistakes in the past). Can you imagine how much a new water heater would have cost at 10pm??

So I am at work this morning, and I notice the sadness start creeping up in me again. No problem, I know how to help myself feel better. I will not let today end up like Sunday and Monday were. I want another good day please. I chalk it up to really not seeing Jenn much yesterday, I mean she didn't get home from work until 7:15, so I really only saw her for a little over an hour before I locked myself in the bedroom.

I get myself figured out when one of my coworkers friends comes in and says "So, hows my favorite pregnant lady doing?" Poor guy. I immediately dissolved into a pool of tears and my boss came running out of his office box of tissues in hand.

I only ever told four people out loud about Blueberry leaving. My dad and mom, Elissa and Lyz. Everyone else either heard it through the grapevine, or Jenn told them. I couldn't. I couldn't even tell Philip as he stood there apologizing, I just let him assume what I was crying about.

Tomorrow we have our three doctor appointments. I know that more crying will ensue. I wish that we could walk in there tomorrow and Dr. Martin would say "I figured it out, this is what went wrong". I don't care if it was even something I did or didn't do, I mean I am blaming myself anyway right? At least this way I would know what to do differently next time.

After the appointments we are going out to lunch. And then we're gonna head home to start prepping for Florida.

I need Florida like a crack whore needs a fix.