Saturday, May 31, 2008

Meltdowns, Yard Sales and Why the Universe won't let me have a baby, Oh My!

Friday night we again headed over to Lyz's house, this time to put together the huge carport size canopy so that we could store things under it in case it rained. Hysterical. I haven't laughed that hard in a very very long time. Someone had thrown away the directions...always fun :)

Once we got it up we went to dinner with Lyz, Chris and Avery, and Lyz's mom Joni (who we sometimes call J-Mo, short for Joni-Mom) and her new boyfriend Dennis.

Headed home for an early bed time, we had to get up at 4am so being in bed at 10:30pm was actually really late. Jenn and I watched Top Chef to unwind then tried to fall asleep. I was almost there when Elissa texted to tell us they had just gotten to Dover, traffic was horrible. I laid back down after sending her my goodnights and started to think. Thinking is never a good thing with me. I started thinking about Blue...and how different this week would have been if my belly was big...and I let myself get in too deep. I proceeded to let myself go into full meltdown mode. It took Jenn quite awhile to get me calm. I guess that meltdown had been building up for awhile. Jenn fell asleep around 3 and the last time I looked at the clock it said 3:45. Wow, 15 minutes of sleep. Why do I choose the worst times to have meltdowns?

The garage sale was a BLAST!!!! We opened the garage doors at 6am to start setting up in the driveway and within 2 minutes we had our first customer. We hadn't even start pulling the stuff out yet! By 8am (the offical start time) the sale was hopping!!! I sold all of my Sizzix scrapbooking supplies to one woman for a steal. I cried. I actually went into the house and cried. I don't regret it in the least, but I was mourning the fact that I haven't scrapbooked since we lost Blue. I need to get Heidi back, and I think watching that Sizzix walk away made me realize how much of Heidi I have lost.

Jenn manned the grill (we sold hot dogs, soft pretzels and sodas) and Lyz manned the cash box. It was really hot so I wandered around rearranging tables, and would head inside to check on Avery here and there to get cool in the air conditioning. I don't regulate my body heat very well, I don't sweat, so I drank pleanty of water and wiped myself down with a cool wet towel occasionally.

At 10:30 the skies opened and it began pouring. I actually think we sold more once the rain started falling because there were still a billion shoppers, and we were the only ones in the neighborhood with all of our tables covered! Chris was even escorting people from their cars to the the carport and garage with an umbrella!

All told we made $410.00, not bad for a ton of junk, and a bit of hard work! Jenn and Lyz are going to do the sale again next Saturday because there is a ton of stuff leftover, and if it hadn't started down pouring, I think we would have sold a lot more!

After we shut down we all went inside and while 98% of me mostly believes that what the 2% of me thinks is wrong, I still do. I made Avery cry, by complete accident and when it was my turn to hug her I began crying too. I made a 2.5 year old cry, no wonder the universe won't let me have a baby, I'd make a horrible mother. Yes, I know that isn't totally true, but it is how I feel. I feel horrible.

You know what else makes me feel bad? Me, the chick who has a camera constantly strapped to her neck, only took one picture all day, silly Heidi.

7 comments:

Chris said...

Yard sales are just the best! I'm so jealous! Enjoy what's left of the weekend . . .

Just visiting from NCLM . . .

JamieD said...

I am sorry you had a meltdown come out of nowhere. I hate those quiet moments when I can't control the direction of my thoughts.

Congrats on the sale!! WOW!! Hot dogs AND soft pretzels?!?! I go to the wrong sales!!

tbean said...

You will be a terrific, wonderful mom Heidi. Don't let the mean part of your brain tell yourself differently.

seussgirl said...

Hi from NCLM...
I really need to have a yard sale this summer (saving up stuff in the attic), but I haven't had the energy yet.
I'm glad it went fairly well; hope you have a chance to have one in good weather!

Lyz said...

I finally have to post a comment on my dear friends board. She DID NOT make my child cry. It was actually my mom and Avery was scared. Heidi is the most amazing wonderful patient woman with my child and I envy the children who get to call her mom. My daughter is heads over heals in love with her Heidi, and so am I!!

my cowgirl alter-ego said...

Meltdowns never come at the right time. :(

You didn't sell your towel, did you?

B said...

Sorry about the meltdown. I'm glad Jenn was there to help ya calm down a bit..and I hope you're feeling better today. It doesn't really get easier, does it? We learn to hide it better, but it's still there.